Badger's Den

Pride
2:33 p.m. - 2008-07-02

This month in honor of Pride Month, my company for the first time flew a pride flag in front of one of its buildings.

Of course it created a bit of a stir. For me though, it sent a much needed message that my company is proud to have me working for them just as I am.

Yet in all the vitriol that was unleashed, I noticed one thing missing. This was not about a flag or a social postion. This was about the people. It was about the hundreds if not thousands of LGBT employees.

It was akin to Patrick Swayze saying "nobody puts Baby in the corner."

Coming Out Part 137
2:09 p.m. - 2008-07-02

I couldn't sleep this morning. Something my manager said at lunch today got my mind whirling.

In my previous position where I travelled a lot with co-workers, I was pretty much out. It's hard to spend a week on the road with someone and be unable to talk about what's important to you. The team was very accepting, but I think my boss had issues. In my current position, I have not been explicitly out, though a few people know. But I also don't hide the time I spend with Eugene.

Yesterday at lunch, my manager was discussing the company's several afinity groups including the one for GLBT people. He was moaning about how straight white males are about the only ones without an afinity group. I don't have one, he said then pointed at me and said you don't either.

I was tempted to correct him but there were 5 people at the table so courage escaped me. Another illustration of how coming out is not a one time event but something we face every day of our lives.

When he felt excluded, I did tell him he was invited to attend any group he wants to as a supporter. He mentioned going to the LGBT group - the week he retires.

I also took the opportunity to explain more about the purpose of these groups, that they weren't social clubs. They gave minority employees the opportunity to network and find support. The provide the company with the information it needs to hire and retain minority employees and their allies.

He later dismissed an upcoming diversity seminar he is required to attend as a tedious waste of time.

Yesterday afternoon though, I debated whether to come out to my manager. And about 4am this morning, my mind was working through the process. First I need opportunity which hasn't come about today. I prayed for God to give me time with this very busy man.

Some things I would like to tell him...

He grew up and lives in a society designed perfectly for the white, straight male, especially the Type A personality he is. He never had to look at someone he found attractive and wonder if they were a woman, and 9 times out of 10 realize they weren't.

I also want him to understand that you can't tell by looking at people. You can't even tell with your closest relations - parent, sibling, child or even spouse.

So I hope it will improve his sensitivity, but more importantly I hope to improve my self-esteem and pride in what I have become.

Wednesday
1:31 p.m. - 2008-07-02

Heading to Madison tomorrow to spend the weekend with Eugene. Fortunately, our friends are letting us stay with them.

Went to Krispy Kreme this morning to get birthday donuts to take to work. They were out of donuts. Eight o'clock in the morning and their out of donuts. But I can wait 15 minutes if I want. Sigh. Maybe it's a sign that I should bring in birthday carrots ;)

Very hectic & stressful at work the past two weeks. People are needing my help on a lot of things. I'm trying to pace myself. A short night might also be contributing something as well. I'll put my thoughts in a separate entry.

Went to my folks last night and out with Tim and Carolyn tonight. I need a nap though.

Some Weekend Pix
1:10 p.m. - 2008-06-26

Some pix from our weekend...

Saturday we went to one of the farmers markets...

While we're out geocaching we come across a decent beach along the river.

Here Eugene is contemplating making this a nude beach...

Then he gets campy. Nope, Eugene, you don't look gay at all.

And finally all tuckered out...

It looks like he belongs here.

Long Weekend with Eugene
9:09 a.m. - 2008-06-25

Eugene was here and it was a perfect weekend. It's more and more like he lives here with extended absences. We went to my Mom's Thursday night where Mandy cooked my mom a birthday dinner. We played Euchre where Eugene and I lost 5 games in a row.

Friday we went out for breakfast, hit Walmart because someone forgot to pack underwear ;D and stopped at the Chinese grocery for hot sauce.

Then we went biking. I dropped him off several miles from the trail head so he could powerbike. We met at the trail head where he about passed out. recovered, we then rode together about 8 miles.

In the evening we grilled chops and went geocaching. JB came over for a bit then we stayed up late watching "Another Gay Movie" which was funny.

Saturday we started with the farmers markets, went geocaching again and grilled steaks. Tim came over and watched "Jumper" with us. It was a good movie mainly from it's unique premise. Of course the cute guys didn't hurt at all ;)

Of course by this time Eugene was going into bar withdrawal, so we went to a cool Irish bar I had never been to. Drinks were reasonable and there was a good crowd there. We really enjoyed it.

Sunday we went to mass (j/k) - not. Went to Perkins where we ran into some of the gayborhood. We spent the day caching discoving a neat hiking area that lead to a beach on the lake that we decided might make a good nude beach if people were properly prepared.

Sunday evening we were back at Mom's for my high carb, high fat birthday dinner of frid chicken, mashed potatoes, fried okra adn apple pie. We tried to make it an early night.

Monday it was back to work for me and home for Eugene. Next visit will be 4th of July weekend in Wisconsin. Can't wait!

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